The Ivy

We started off our Saturday morning as any other sleeping late and dreaming of nothing. Then at noon we had this brilliant idea to go to The Ivy this famous restaurant in LA. First I did the first thing when I don't want to be bothered to call I go to http://www.opentable.com/ to book a table online. Well, no listing for The Ivy so I break down and call them for lunch reservations and there is room at 3:15pm -- kinda late for lunch but we'll take it because it is The Ivy.

I printed the directions and some reviews to read to John on the way there. CitySearch.com had lots of reviews about celebrity sightings, eating on the patio, and how expensive the food is. Other reviews go on and on about how bad the wait staff is and the state of the restaurant, a veritable shack, as well as the ordinariness of the food.

We turned on Maude, our beloved GPS, just before we got there. I was quite upset at her because she gave us slightly different directions from Yahoo which made us do a left turn onto Robertson from San Vicente. Oy! It took us forever to make that turn because each turn of the light only let through 1-2 cars because of on coming traffic. We finally make it there looking at the neighborhood thank God for valet parking! There wasn't a single street parking space in sight!

We had called to say we were going to be late, 15 minutes would have been 8 if not for that left turn, it appeared to be no big deal since we still waited to be seated. We asked to sit inside and Maitre D just as he was about to lead us inside he mentioned that an outside table freed up at which we could be seated I overheard them say there was a walk off. Good for us. The patio table was being prepped and just as it was ready he started leading us in inside the restaurant. When I looked toward the table on the patio with a question in my eyes, he gave me a big fat smile and said it was no longer available because it was being prepped for a table for six. I was not miffed at all because some of the blogs tell you to expect to be bumped. Except in this case it was not for some celebrity -- too good to be true.

It was a homey 2 room shack of a restaurant but it was cozy. I got the crab cakes (yum) and John had the Caesar to start and I had the mesqite grilled Cajun shrimp and John the Swordfish for entrees. It was good American comfort food but unbelievably pricey. Since we got there at 3:30pm we were way past the lunch prices time. The bill certainly gave me cause for pause especially since there were no celebrity sightings and this is one of those times I will not be sharing the amount. This was shucked up to a i-can-say-i-went-to ... experience -- nuff said. A couple of the side dishes were interesting a mound of pureed cauliflower which tasted lime it had some blue cheese in it and some pureed squash (yuk!). There was also this lime tomatilla sauce which I tasted and quickly passed on to my don't-eat-ever-again list. I must admit that is a little harsh but I am not crazy about sauces because I believe they mask natural food flavors -- this was no exception, it was kind of horrible. I only ate the pureed cauliflower.

Between eating the lovely brown bread, a large bottle of pellegrino, linner, and coffee we were stuffed. No room for dessert which was really a pity because there were some good reviews about dessert. On another note, the waiter was an interesting bloke, he creeped me out a little because his movements were slow and deliberate and reminded me of slo mo movie. For example, when he gave us the bill it felt like he just about passed our table when he turned back and slowly placed the bill on the table. He also waited for a beat before he smiled like he had to remind himself that it was part of the waiter's hand book and even then it was a reveal of his beautiful row of teeth with upturned mouth corners rather than a smile. Hmm...made me wonder if he was the character from Phantasm.

Not much drama around except us witnessing a couple of ladies right next to us fight over the bill and try not to tear it - quite funny. Since they must have realized they looked quite comic so one of the ladies leaned over to explain to me that her friend had come to visit her from Minneapolis so it was only natural that she pay the bill. I told her I was staying out of it. They solved it amicably with some pact to which John and I were witnesses -- have no idea what the pact was.

After the wonderful meal minus the sauces stuffed to the gills, we pulled out into the LA afternoon traffic and headed for home. If you have been to LA I do not need to describe the traffic. It is rather unreal that at 5:30pm on a Saturday traffic is backed up on LA highways but it is.